Getting Better by Working with the Best: Issue One

I am writing this on a Monday morning intent with the idea of writing a tell all book of my work place. Don’t worry circle of friends, it is not that kind of tell all. It isn’t that juicy. I ordered the Jessica Simpson memoir for that. This is the kind of tell-all where I tell-all of my readers how I began as a lack luster teacher and turned into the semi-competent teacher I am today. Now when I say I began as a lack luster teacher that isn’t exactly true. I did wonderful at UMF, I had phenomenal placements when I student taught and I was supremely confident when I graduated and was offered my first teaching position. The hard part about beginning teaching is that you have this false sense of confidence, but you don’t really know anything. Some people act like they do, they come to a teaching interview and they say all the right things, but they really don’t know shit. Maybe this is the same for all professions? I’m not really sure. Do we all start at ground zero? My largest saving grace when I began teaching was a woman named Deb Carey. She retired a few years ago. But she was the warmest, most maternal person and friend to learn from . At a time when the academics of K was really amping up, she held firm on playing in the dirt, painting and songs. Unfortunately, teachers can be competitive with each other, try to outdo each other, let the newbie flop around a little bit before they find their way. This was never Deb. She was always willing to share and always willing to spill the truth. When you begin teaching, everything matters and she shared an awesome piece of advice with me, it really doesn’t. The big stuff matters, the overall lesson, but the perfection of it does not. the losing sleep of it does not. My first year as a teacher, I made the decision to buy a house I couldn’t afford, get married and get pregnant. I would not recommend this to anyone at all. It was a nightmare. When I had my daughter prematurely in March, she was there for me in more ways than any normal colleague could be expected to be. During the same time, I was trying to come off as impressive to my administrator. I am very much a people pleaser. This extends all the way back to my divorced parents and being a middle child. I was incredibly intimidated by Karen in the early days. Karen is the type of woman who finds more hours in the day than the average gal. She can do re-do her kitchen, while babysitting her grandson, run a staff meeting and the list goes on and on. She has endless energy and drive. To be clear, I am envious. Sometimes, I get so in my own head, the only thing I accomplish is wiping down the counter and saying there, now you’ve done that for the day, now go write it on your to do-list and CROSS IT OFF. You a beast girl! With that being said, I was pleasantly surprised with how patient Karen was with my formal observations. I feel like teaching is the oddest career path, because you graduate school absolutely broke, you get your first job, earning absolute crap and then someone watches you from the back of the room while you feel your voice shaking and your 14 dollar Target shirt drenched in sweat. Throughout all these observations, I was nervous to the point of having a break down and she would give me tips, she would share resources , and she knew that one can not learn everything at a four year school. After all, the clientele is continuously changing from day-to-day and being adaptable is one of the best skills one can have. When I had Nat premature I had to be out from early March until late May. Yes you heard that right, my first year of teaching, I missed three critical months of my kinders education and they were with a sub. Does this sound familiar? Does it sound like right now maybe? You know what? to my surprise, to my chagrin, to my bloated ego, those kids turned out absolutely fine not having me for that amount of time. They were completely unscathed when I returned in late May and they only had a few weeks left of school. I will always from the bottom of my heart to the tips of my toes be grateful for Karen coming into my classroom and saying when the school day is done, you drive right down to Portland and you be momma for the rest of the evening. She knew how stressed I was to have an infant be miles away in the hospital, needing constant medical supervision while I tried to navigate through the issues every first year teacher will inevitably have. She could see that I needed a job, needed to keep my health insurance, but she could also see my plight as a post partum depressed Momma. Not all admins are as understanding or as sympathetic.

Now, I’m not going to go in any kind of order here, because that is the beauty of blog posts. Some day I want someone to approach me to write that book, but until then I am writing for my own selfish catharsis agenda , for ventilation of the human condition and it takes me on many different paths. One of my paths, led me to one of my greatest friends Aimee. When I first observed Aimee, I immediately cast her aside as not being someone who would fit into my friendship bucket. I thought Aimee was cool, had it all together and I thought she was probably snobby. Isn’t that terrible that girls do that to one another? Size each other up like that? I watched Aimee eat her salad from the Hannaford lunch bar and pour french dressing on it and I thought she is way too cool for me. One morning, she came into my classroom after I had maxed out my credit card, buying items no one would use and she offered me some construction paper. I was so nervous and green at the time, I think I looked at my toes and mumbled that yes I would take it. She told me she ordered too much. Maybe she did , maybe she didn’t. Either way olive branch formed, friendship jumpstarted. Never assume the new person has it all together at work. They don’t , they are struggling, anything you can offer is going to feel better than the morning that new person had. As time went on, Aimee and I began running after school and she even convinced me to do one of my early 5 K races. When I did my first half marathon, it was the actual worst. I was so slow, I think I was running backwards. I could see the drink volunteers packing up, I could see the street crew cleaning up the cones and I still had four. miles. left. When I finally finished, in all my sweat, asthma, induced glory, it was Aimee standing at my finish line along with a few family members and not many others. She has been A Diana Barry for me ever since. When my step-brother died, Aimee gave me a bracelet that reads one day at a time and I have never taken it off since. She knows some days are hard for me, she knows I am both great at my job but struggle struggle struggle all the time for various reasons. I have learned so much from Aimee from not just a professional standpoint, but from supporting each other at work even when other people don’t know the suck that you are trudging through.

Another LER angel I was blessed to meet along the way, is a hilarious woman by the name of Andrea. I’m not sure how Andrea began helping me at the end of the day in my K classroom. It may have been that it was too loud, it may have been that I begged Karen for help, it may have been that I laid down starfish like outside my room and she felt sorry for me. Either way for at least 6 years of my kindergarten career, Andrea Gruber came down to my classroom for twenty to twenty five minutes of HER prep time and helped me dress kids for the cold, find mittens, zip ski pants, have one-on-one convos with kids who really needed it and didn’t get that at home. Sometimes she would read to them while I was buttoning and snapping and sometimes I would. This was never something that was expected of her in her daily planner, she just did it. Anytime I have ever had a family crisis come up, Andrea has been willing to help me on the drop of a hat, any recess duty, any 2:00 orthodontist appointment. Do you have someone like that you work with? That is so selfless, so giving, the whole building benefits, especially the kids, more importantly the kids. She helped me to see there is no hierarchy of educators at schools, no tiered system of teachers and techs, teachers and custodians. It is a we system, where she jumps in when someone else is going to lose their ever loving mind and we all benefit. She is truly a gem.

I am one hour in to this juicy LER tell-all and so I am going to close for the time being (more to come) on my lovely friend Jordan or Juuurdan as she says her Gram calls her. Jordan is hands down, one of the coolest, most hilarious, most beautiful people I have ever met in real life. When I first worked with Jordan she had already taught in two different grade levels and I was in awe of her classroom. Any colleague or any parent that enters Jordan’s classroom should be in awe of it. She works so tirelessly on the theme, the motif, but more importantly, the emotion that it calls up, the safeness that it makes kids feel is truly remarkable. It doesn’t just feel like a change of space to kids, it feels like THEIR space. Jordan has many talents, specifically in teaching math, technology and organization. She has stickies for stickies, she has sharpies that write for other sharpies. I still clunk around in anything to do with technology, but between her and Michael Johnson, I’m almost a real robot and not just a pretender anymore! In writing all of these things, and seeing how much she has assisted me in my teaching career, Jordan has a lot of street cred that she doesn’t always get. When I say street cred, I mean a teacher can give her a kiddo that they are worried about, a non-reader , a student from a trauma home and she will take care of that little Bumbino (is that a word? I’m not sure), she will advocate for them, push for them, not take no for an answer for them, and this is not something you get in an EDU 101 class . This is innate, this is special, and I try to take this on every year a new round of fish swim in.

Now you might think that the above personalities mentioned would have shaped me into my current status, but I am a life-long learner don’t you know. So absolutely I have more people to name at a later date. I work at a special little slice of creation, stuffed to the brim with skill sets, ripe for the picking! Enjoy your Monday and if you have people at work that you have learned from like I did, tell them, even if it’s only in the form of a gifted coffee. Be Well my Lovelies!