Restart

It is a little nerve wracking to send your kid to a basketball game after three months of extreme remote schooling, Netflix and three times a week ice cream sundaes. Not a whole lot of basketball going on up in here. But we are all nervous and excited for her to play nonetheless. There are stipulations ya know, new regulations, the new normal is out and about everyone. . I guess the cheer leaders can no longer hug it out or use spit tanks, which is kind of a bummer . I personally enjoyed the spit tanks. And only a certain number of parents are allotted into the game to socially distance and the ones who are allowed can no longer send the younger siblings down the entire row of bleachers to buy a hot dog and kool aid, only to spill mustard on the entire audience as they make their way back . I’m not sure who is taking this hit the worst. The sports boosters, the hotdogs, or the four-year-olds that no one pays attention too during the game.

Also, those parents who like to scream and berate the official are going to have a hard time. You can still scream, swear and rage out with a mask, but it isn’t quite the same and so I hope those that forgot to enter anger management will be okay. Come see me angry folk if you aren’t! We can work something out, find someone for you to belittle during youth sports.

In the beginning, I tried to have my fifth grader do workouts with me, but it became quite painful for both of us and so I have just pushed the biking, the walking and the running as of late. And when I say pushed the biking, I absolutely mean that I tell both my kids to go ride their bikes for a full half hour on our road without disturbing me. I usually follow that up by telling them not to do anything I wouldn’t do, and don’t you dare get hurt, because no one is bringing your ass to the emergency room. I think this is bringing out plenty of grit for both of them and will make them better workers or better criminals.

I try to imagine how my daughter will do in her first game with zero practice time and increased precautions on the bench. I know we have a few positives in our direction though. Did someone mention a new uniform? Oh no you didn’t. Oh yes we did, that’s right, the tween tigers, the Corona Crushers, we are definitely dressed for success in our first game back out on the court. Half of being the part is looking the part, and so we have that going for us. Also, I have seen most of her team at various barbecues, rodeos, and line dancing events and someone has been eating their protein bars since March. I think between all of them, we have gained 10 inches. How exciting isn’t it? Love to watch these little ballers come into their own.

Besides the height and the new uniforms, the game could be a little rough, not like that movie Dodgeball rough, but more like the Replacement movie, the one with Keanu Reeves. We will have some confusion, my kid may forget the plays, we may need a tank of oxygen at one end of this freshly sanitized basketball court, but no matter. They are going to be playing. They are going to be allowed to be kids and not just prison inmates and hopeful TikTok dancers.

Since we have a limit on parents allowed to attend, I drew the short straw this round. My husband beat me to it. But I will make sure to get a play-by-play from him and then dramatize that on here, you know, for the love of my six faithful readers. Happy Saturday everyone, we will make our way back to school and sports one way or the other.