Rona Mood Swings

March was a dark month for me, the ultimate dark of dark caves, April was eh and May has been better to me, but man have I been riding some mood swings through this Rona ride. One minute I will feel like a life style guru, taking runs and chugging water, looking at all the sorry saps who refuse to get it together and the next minute I am being tailgated by a silver truck and shouting at him about his small anatomy. BUT, in my defense, where do people need to go that quickly in these times? Nobody is late to school, I checked and he had no pregnant wife screaming in labor beside him. So does he really need to follow my Highlander THAT closely, so that we are basically sitting together in the front seat? Granted I can drive slow, sometimes I’m really in the zone though. I was doing all the parts of Shoop and I had not missed a lyric, so when I saw him following me that closely from Old New Mills to the middle school and then bust up gravel to get around me, almost hitting oncoming traffic, yeah it really put me in some kind of way for moods. I may or may not have shouted that his penis was small. For this I am sorry, maybe his penis isn’t really THAT small, or maybe it is , but either way, I think we can all stand to be a little kinder, slow it down a little more and just let people be in the moment with their bad singing voices.

On Wednesday, I woke up in an amazing state. I worked out, I had seen my girls from work, but then my daughter showed me that she has essentially been doing all the wrong math work remotely and was blubbering in tears. I did what any good Mom does, which is I emailed her teacher and I said the shit has hit the fan in this house. He responded kindly and with patience and her and I sat down together for fractions 101. I don’t know if you have a 5th grader. Do they understand fractions? Mine thinks she does, she is sure she does, she waves me off like she does, but girlfriend, and I say this with love, but she doesn’t know shit about shit with fractions. So we are listening to the Khan academy man. I brought out some graham crackers, I am breaking them into parts showing her. She is screaming at me that all I want to do is eat graham crackers. I nod shamefully, because I really just did want to eat them and I also hate fractions. Then we take the quiz together and she misses one question so she is flailing her arms about how she needs to be perfect with fractions and I thought we weren’t perfect in this house. Then my mood changes again, because she really should be gearing up for her Boston trip and it’s true that we gave up perfection in my house March 14th. So I give her permission to abandon Khan academy, the quizzes, and the upbeat Jimmy Fallon sounding Khan academy voice doing the remedial quizzes. Should I have cut her slack? I don’t know? Because of the moods. One minute I’m up in the clouds, the next I am belittling men and making fun of their manhoods in frustration. It’s just so hard to tell. What to do even do any more.

Yesterday, I went to order food at the Quarry. I pick different locally places depending on my mood every week and eat emotionally from 6:00 to 6:45. I had mapped out my menu with calculated interest. Should I do the tap house burger? No maybe the seasoned french fries? Ohhh, I wonder if the mac and cheese is good. By the time I actually called, I was in such an emotional state of giddiness that you would have thought I had won the lottery. I was breathing so deeply when the employee answered, that when she told me they had a full house and were no longer doing take out, I think I actually whimpered into the air. Like are you serious right now? After all my careful planning and I’m going to have cook my own food and do my own damn dishes. Immediately , I went to plan B. Who else wants to cook me dinner. This led to the Depot. I ordered food and asked Joe to pick it up. When he came home with one container, I was a little bemused. He sat down in typical guy fashion and looked around asking the three of us what we were eating. He opened up a container of wings, still not befuddled that none of us had actually ordered wings. What the Hell universe?? How many Joe’s are there going to the Depot??? Okay probably a lot, so now I’m heading back downtown and I drive by the Blind Pig and the outside dining people. The people look so happy sitting out there on the picnic tables and laughing and getting the right meals. A part of me, a large part of me, wanted to just abandon my mixed up family meals and just sit down at one of those tables and order a summer beverage and just be for a minute. These are the ups and downs of my days. How are your moods lately? Maybe you are one of those lucky people who owns a boat or a pool. I think that is part of the solution to the mood escalator, but I’ll be damned if the Rona is going to beat me at this game too!